Hey, Miss, understand me.

Living with a three-year-old is quite surreal at times. Nate is always so sure of himself, and he always takes it upon himself to correct me. Tonight he was watching Sesame Street and I said something about Kermit the Frog. He said, “No, daddy, it’s Hermit the Frog.” We went around a couple of times, but I think I managed to convince him that it’s Kermit.

Daylight Saving Time is another source of disagreement in our family. He wanted to know why the sun was still out when we got home from school today. I tried to explain that as we get closer to summer, the days are getting longer and the nights are getting shorter. His face lit up in understanding, and he said, “Aha! It’s because boys have shorter hair, and girls have longer hair.” I gave up at that point.

I don’t usually go out of my way to confuse him, but we do seem to spend a lot of time oscillating between him not knowing what the hell I’m talking about, and him thinking that I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about. So sometimes I simply can’t resist messing with him. I love to use archaic slang, just to see what he’ll do with it. The other morning, I asked him to put on his jacket, and he ran into the family room, laughing and yelling, “No way!”

I put on my best Sheriff J. W. Pepper accent and bellowed, “Boah! You best mind yo’ pappy, or you’ll taste the back o’ mah hand!”

He giggled, ran in to the mudroom, slurped his tongue across my knuckles, and said, “It tastes like chocolate vanilla!”

2 thoughts on “Hey, Miss, understand me.

  1. Your post this morning cracked me up. Don’t you wish you could just look inside their heads and figure out how they come up with some of these things? I remember having a talk with one of my preschoolers at one point about why girls go into the girls bathroom and boys go into the boys bathroom, and she looked at me very earnestly and said, “Oh, yeah, I know. Sometimes the bear comes out.” My co-teacher and I looked at each other, raised our eyebrows, and decided to leave the rest of that particular conversation to her parents.

  2. Dave,

    Your post brought back memories of when the kids were little. Jim and I still remember lots of stuff the kids have said. In fact, yesterday I talked to James (now 6) on the phone as Jim and I were headed to NH for yet another passing of a dear friend, and he asked me if I was done talking to him and I said “In a minute..” After I talked a little more he replied ” Is your minute up yet, cause it seems like a long minute”. Gotta love those little guys. We think of you often and would love to see you guys. Did you know that toddlers and preschoolers laugh 80% more than adults. Guess that is why I teach preschool!

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